Because it's Friday, I am stealing this in its entirety from McSweeney's.
7 Things Mario Games Have in Common With the Bible.
By Jake Ardoin
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1. Stars sometimes play important role.
2. One man saves everyone.
3. Hero comes back to life after dying.
4. Nationality of main hero is a minority.
5. Main hero has a trade unrelated to his role in story.
6. Women most often the cause of all the trouble.
7. Talking reptiles.