80's Movie Line of the Week

Good Morning Vietnam makes a comment on both sanity and taste.

Edward Garlick: No, Phil, he's not all right. A man does not refer to Pat Boone as a beautiful genius if things are all right.

And There Was Much Rejoicing

Is there an upside to our economic woes?

While car purchases plummeted and designer clothes mostly stayed on the racks, sales of condoms in the U.S. rose 5% in the fourth quarter of 2008, and 6% in January vs. the same time periods the previous year, The Nielsen Co. reports.

Yeah for us!

Via Slate.

History Isn't About Dates

Republicans have been running around for awhile now trying to blame the country's economic problems on Obama despite the fact that he has been president for a fraction of their existence. Perhaps the argument is that our collective intuition that he would become president set this downturn in motion.

But he is in good company. Apparently, FDR also had the ability to cause financial ruin preemptively. At least that's what Republican Representative Steve Austria said.

“When (President Franklin) Roosevelt did this, he put our country into a Great Depression,” Austria said. “He tried to borrow and spend, he tried to use the Keynesian approach, and our country ended up in a Great Depression. That’s just history.”

Most historians date the beginning of the Great Depression at or shortly after the stock-market crash of 1929; Roosevelt took office in 1933.

This seems like a pretty significant power that Democratic presidents have. You would think they might find a better use for it than ruining the economy. On the other hand, they do hate America so...

Via Matt Yglesias.

Is It Time Yet?

Have we crossed the threshold? Is it officially time to become excited about the Missouri Tigers' prospects for some postseason success? I think maybe it is. After beating Kansas Monday night, it looks like the Tigers have the #3 seed in the Big 12 tournament wrapped up. Depending on what KU and the Tigers do down the stretch, they might be able to climb to #2.

Or it could all implode at any moment. That seems to be how it is watching these Tigers. They are wild fun, but thoroughly infuriating. Of course, that is kind of the point. That is how games will be in the Mike Anderson system. And it's fine with me. I was happy when MU hired Anderson because, if nothing else, I knew we would be entertained.

That is certainly happening now. And the Tigers have entertained their way to #17 in the RPI. If they can finish with no more than 1 or 2 losses the rest of the way, they can earn at least a 5 seed in the NCAA tourney, and would have a shot at a 3 or 4 seed if things go better. That is quite a turnaround from a team that was mostly just infuriating last year.

So, I'm on the bandwagon. I think there may be some good things ahead. The Tigers have now won a couple of close games with good opponents which will serve them well down the road. We may see another 16 point half before the end of the season, but we'll definitely see the effort that lead to the furious second half rally as well. No matter what, it'll be fun to watch.

How Bad Is It?

Pretty bad. Barring an amazing turnaround, it looks like the Depression may get a run for its money. Republicans might want to take note.

Via Kevin Drum.

80's Movie Line of the Week

Good advice on living from Teen Wolf.

Coach Finstock: There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.

Awesome Kid

They gave him the good stuff.

New Phones

I got a new phone yesterday. It's an interesting experience getting a new phone because it is the tool most integral in your daily life (or mine anyway). Getting rid of an old phone means purging texts and call logs and a bunch of other stuff that represent good times, bad times and every other kind of time.

So a new phone is a fresh start, a fresh start with a new partner. If you go by the contract you sign, you've just acquired your sidekick for the next two years.

Your new relationship with your phone is like any other new relationship. It takes some time to figure out the new partner, and even more time to get comfortable with the differences between this relationship and all those previous. And like every partner in life, this one will deliver both joy and misery, irritate the hell out of you sometimes and wear out when you won't just shut up.

The New York Experience in Legos

As a kid, I loved Legos. I would say probably better than 2/3 of my time playing with toys involved Legos. My sister and I would build towns, spaceships and just about anything else you could imagine.

We never though about a project like though. Artist Christopher Niemann imagines New York through Legos. These are three of my favorites, but there are quite a few if you follow the link.

Bonus Question(able)

I'm a couple of days late on this, but I've been busy. Apparently, I should have been busy losing other people's money.

Wall Street firms slashed cash bonuses for New York City employees by 44 percent in 2008, as they reeled from record losses in the securities industry, New York State’s comptroller said in a report issued on Wednesday.

Bonuses fell to $18.4 billion from $32.9 billion in 2007, the largest decline ever and the biggest percentage drop in more than 30 years, Comptroller Thomas DiNapoli said. The size of the bonus pool is the sixth-largest on record, he said.

So the people who helped us lose a significant chunk of our national wealth punished themselves by rewarding themselves with a measly $18 billion. I would like to second Joe Biden:

"I'd like to throw these guys in the brig," Biden said in an interview with CNBC.

80's Movie Line of the Week

You know those people who kind of sound like they know what they are talking about, but really have no clue whatsoever? And you know how they are usually the most likely people to really believe that they know what they are talking about, which is the best proof that they have no clue whatsoever? Well, A Fish Called Wanda understood those people.

Wanda: Aristotle was not Belgian, the principle of Buddhism is not "every man for himself", and the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, Otto. I looked them up.

Lowbrow

There is an article on the NY Times website about places in the UK with funny names. Not just funny names, but sophomorically funny names.

These include Crotch Crescent, Oxford; Titty Ho, Northamptonshire; Wetwang, East Yorkshire; Slutshole Lane, Norfolk; and Thong, Kent. And, in a country that delights in lavatory humor, particularly if the word “bottom” is involved, there is Pratts Bottom, in Kent, doubly cursed because “prat” is slang for buffoon.

The funniest towns I have ever been to are Intercourse, Pennsylvania and Ballingarry in Ireland. Anyone else have any?

More Explanation Please

There is a story on the Star website talking about charges being dropped against two sisters because a Kansas sheriff was too busy being charged with extortion of a strip club to pursue the case.

Supposedly, the two sisters had robbed a church. The story goes on to talk about the criminal records of the sisters, and it looks pretty unlikely they are innocent. But in the middle of the story is this paragraph:

In 2004, they were accused of plotting to enroll Birdie Hoaks at Galena Middle School, where she posed as a 13-year-old boy. Felony theft charges in that case were dismissed in 2005.

No further exposition on this topic is presented in the article. I know it isn't integral to the point of the story, but if anything ever cried out for some explanation it has to be that paragraph, right?

Let There Be Rock

My ears are still ringing. I’ve got a bit of a headache. My wallet is a little lighter.

Totally worth it.

As a high school kid, I was a huge AC/DC fan (as a high school kid, who isn’t). I still listen to the boys from Australia, but not regularly. When I found out they were going to be playing at the Spring Center, however, I was ecstatic. There are only a few bands on the planet with the stature of AC/DC that you still have the good fortune to be able to see play.

I went last night with a buddy and a couple of other good guys who were buddies of another buddy. The show was everything I hoped for. Really loud, a little sleazy, visually spectacular and, for all intents and purposes, just a giant party.

It really doesn’t matter that most of the band is about 60 years old. It doesn’t matter that Brian Johnson looks like the spawn of Harvey Keitel and Bette Midler (see below). It doesn’t matter that Malcolm looks like the spawn of Iggy Pop and Gollum. It doesn’t matter that Angus has a clearly visible elastic waistband in his classic schoolboy shorts.



It doesn’t matter because they still rock. They don’t just rock for a bunch of 60 year-olds, they just plain rock. They rolled through their set with more energy than you see out of most bands half their ages.

Tim Finn put a review up on The Star website and, as always, helpfully included a set list.

Setlist: Rock 'N' Roll Train; Hell Ain't a Bad Place to Be; Back in Black; Big Jack; Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap; Thunderstruck; Black Ice; The Jack; Hell's Bells; Shoot To Thrill; War Machine; Anything Goes; You Shook Me All Night Long; TNT; Whole Lotta Rosie; Let There Be Rock. Encore: Highway to Hell; For Those About To Rock.

The highlights of the show were the back to back playing of two of my favorites, Dirty Deeds and Thunderstruck, and the back to back playing of TNT and Rosie. TNT included fireballs busting out all over the stage and the classic “oy” chant from the crowd. They followed that up with Rosie, which isn’t one of my favorite AC/DC songs. But anytime you produce a Macy’s Day Parade balloon of an overweight stripper who taps her feet to the beat of the song, you have a pretty good shot at winning me over. If anyone has a decent shot of this, by the way, please let me know and I will link to it. My camera phone is a piece.

Also pretty incredible was the Angus guitar solo 20 feet in the air in the middle of the arena. I was on the floor not quite halfway back, so the whole thing took place within a distance that might have been traumatizing if he had fallen of the platform. And I must say I was afraid he might.

Of course, it wouldn’t be right to talk about the show without mentioning the crowd. For one thing, there were a whole lotta Rosies. Seriously, if they don’t know better, shouldn’t their significant others step up and tell them? Anyway, there were a predictable number of mullets and tanktops.

But most of my entertainment from the crowd came from the guy in front of me who held is arms in the air through most of the concert as though he had just won an Olympic race. The poor guy next to him got a forearm to the face at least 15 times throughout the evening, and handled it pretty well. I managed to avoid his beer-clenching left hand a couple of times as he swayed somewhat in time with the music. During the break between the main set and the encore he tried to sit in his seat, which he had earlier folded up. His lady friend watched him go down and chose to leave him there until the encore began. At the point she helped him to his feet, and he resumed his victory celebration.

I also had the good fortune to meet Rick of local band Local Stranger. Rick told my companions and me about the awesomeness of Local Stranger, their website, and their upcoming show at the Ameristar. More importantly, mid-conversation he pulled out the best David Lee Roth wail I’ve heard since, well David Lee Roth. I will definitely be going to see Local Stranger.

So, it was an awesome show. Worth the time, money, and potential hearing loss. If they come around again, go see them.

Inaugural Movie Quote of the Week

It isn't from the 80's, but it seemed too good to pass up as I watched Aretha Franklin sing on the Capitol steps. The movie is My Fellow Americans (1996), and Jack Lemmon and James Garner are two former presidents on the run.

Russell Kramer: When you were in the White House, who was the person you were most excited to meet?
Matt Douglas: Nelson Mandela.
Russell Kramer: I'm not a reporter.
Matt Douglas: Ella Fitzgerald.
Russell Kramer: Ah.
Matt Douglas: Mandela was a great man, but he couldn't sing worth a shit.

Testing Me

Well, the first possible frustration with Obama came quickly. I wanted to write a little blog post about Dick Cheney, the wheelchair and probably a man-sized safe. But President Obama made a heartfelt and beautiful plea for unity today. I'm going to honor that plea... and maybe I even feel good about it.

Awesome!

Enthusiasm heightened. What a moment!

Excitement

Can I just point out that I am unreasonably enthusiastic about the Obama presidency? I am caught up in the excitement of this moment. I am caught up in the possibility of new and great things.

I am sure that there will be bumps in the road, disappointments and frustrations. Obama has an incredibly difficult task ahead. But the promise of what is possible is seriously outweighing all of those concerns at this moment.

Happy Inauguration Day!

Bushisms Retired

Jacob Weisberg has the finale of his Bushisms series at Slate. It's a top 25, and it is filled with all the classics. Food on your family...Fool me once...Is our children learning... All classic stuff.

But I looked at the series trying to decide which one best summed up the legacy of the man. There were three or four contenders, but I've decided on this one:

23. "There's a huge trust. I see it all the time when people come up to me and say, 'I don't want you to let me down again.' "
—Boston, Oct. 3, 2000

The best part is that this was uttered before he actually became president. It was a warning... an unheeded warning. We can only blame ourselves (and maybe the Supreme Court) for giving him the opportunity to let us down again.

Science Day #3 - Chemical Romance

John Tierney writes amsuingly in the New York Times about the scientific basis for a love potion - and an anti-love potion.

In the new issue of Nature, the neuroscientist Larry Young offers a grand unified theory of love. After analyzing the brain chemistry of mammalian pair bonding — and, not incidentally, explaining humans’ peculiar erotic fascination with breasts — Dr. Young predicts that it won’t be long before an unscrupulous suitor could sneak a pharmaceutical love potion into your drink.

That’s the bad news. The not-so-bad news is that you may enjoy this potion if you took it knowingly with the right person. But the really good news, as I see it, is that we might reverse-engineer an anti-love potion, a vaccine preventing you from making an infatuated ass of yourself. Although this love vaccine isn’t mentioned in Dr. Young’s essay, when I raised the prospect he agreed it could also be in the offing.

Tierney raises some interesting points about the usefulness of the anti-love drug. But if you ask me, you have to be pretty cynical not enjoy acting like an infatuated ass when you get the chance.

Science Day #2 - Face Off

This is one I meant to post about awhile ago, but didn't get around to it. Apparently, doctors can now exchange your Nicolas Cage for somebody else's John Travolta.

The operation, announced yesterday at the Cleveland Clinic, was a face transplant from a corpse. Similar procedures have been done three times before, but this was the biggest. Doctors replaced 77 square inches of the patient's face, from her eyelids to her chin. Go look at yourself in the mirror. That's practically the whole you.

... Why spend hundreds of thousands of dollars and risk a patient's life to fix a nonlethal defect? The Cleveland doctors give three reasons. First, this patient had facial damage that impaired her physical functions. She couldn't eat normally, and she could breathe only through a hole in her windpipe. Second, faces, unlike kidneys, have social functions. "They are essential to our communication with the world," argues Maria Siemionow, the doctor who led the Cleveland team. They convey emotion as well as speech.

I, for one, cannot wait to go get my new corpse face put on.

Science Day #1 - Planets

Dan has been hitting local politics really hard. Brian has been talking about math and english. Rusty has been discussing high fashion.

Meanwhile, I've been talking about drinks and local talent shows. I feel like I need to get a little education back into this thing. So today is science day. The first order of business on science day is to check in on the universe. It appears we are getting better at identifying planets outside our solar system.

Two separate teams of scientists reported Wednesday the first-ever detection from Earth of the atmosphere of planets outside our solar system.

Taken together, the studies open a new frontier in the study of exoplanets, hard-to-detect celestial bodies circling stars beyond our own solar system.

Barely 300 exoplanets -- some of which may have conditions similar to those that gave rise to life on Earth -- have been identified so far, though astronomers assume that far more are waiting to be discovered.

The planet we found has absolutely zero chance of being hospitable to human life, but you have to start somewhere. Now all we need is a spaceship that can travel at pretty near the speed of light, and people whose lifespans are a couple of hundred years. That's the easy part right?

Old Fashioned

I got an email from the fairer member of the Gone Mild household (hint: not Dan) linking to an article on the NY Times website that covered the subject of my favorite drink, the Old Fashioned. The point of the article is that it is a drink that inspires much debate.

I soon realized that the Old Fashioned is merely one battle line, albeit a significant one, in a much larger discussion among cocktail fans online that sometimes flared with passion (for regardless of the topic, the Internet has become no place for even-tempered debate). And while the subject of how to mix drinks is typically a pleasant one, the debates over proper recipes, spirits, tools and techniques that are conducted in person — typically over cocktails that have been exactingly described to an increasingly exasperated bartender — or on blogs or online forums such as eGullet and the soon-to-be-defunct Drinkboy forums, can sometimes veer into serious, clinically dry and even belligerent arenas.

The author then gives his recipe for an Old Fashioned. I don't completely agree with his recipe, so I thought I would present to you my Old Fashioned instructions (with commentary).

To make a great Old Fashioned you need the following ingredients:

1. An Old Fashioned glass:



2. Ice:
Enough ice to fill that glass beyond where you think you should. This drink should be cold after all.

3. Simple Syrup:
There are a lot of purists who argue for a single sugar cube muddled with a splash of water. Fine I guess, but simple syrup is a mixture of water and sugar. And it is way faster. I usually use about 2 teaspoons.

4. Fruit:
The author of the article derides the addition of fruit a little bit. I disagree. A maraschino cherry and a and a slice of orange (peel on) add some interesting flavor, beautiful color and a little treat while you're waiting for the next one. And if your complain is that it masks the flavor of the whiskey, then you probably shouldn't have put bitters and sugar in your drink either.

The fruit should be muddled at the bottom of the glass with the simple syrup. It helps bring out the flavor that is hidden in the orange peel and helps distribute the flavor throughout the drink. There are a lot of different muddlers in the world. I like this kind:



5. Whiskey:
I like rye whiskey. It's a little spicier and a little less sweet. Those are good things when you are making a drink with a bunch of sugar in it. There are several varieties of rye for sale in KC. On the high end, Sazerac is fantastic. Kind of unnecessary in a drink like this though. I would suggest Old Overholt. It's $10.99 at Berbiglia.



Bourbon works fine, but I would suggest using a less sweet one like Jim Beam rather than something like Knob Creek.

You need two measures of whiskey, if you're into measuring. Otherwise, fill the glass about halfway (with the ice already in it).

6. Bitters:
When you order an Old Fashioned, 9 times out of 10 you will be served a drink made with Angostura bitters. The 10th time you will wonder why you're drink tastes so much better. The answer is likely that it was made with Peychaud's bitters.

Peychaud's is essentially the same thing as Angostura, but it is a little sweeter, a little more flowery and a beautiful red color. You wouldn't want to use Peychaud's in some drinks that call for bitters because of these differences, but in an Old Fashioned they are perfection. Two dashes of bitters do the trick.



To make the drink:

1. Put the simple syrup and the fruit in the glass and muddle.
2. Add the ice (seriously, lots of it).
3. Add the whiskey.
4. Add the bitters.
5. Add a splash of water (I understand that it doesn't make sense, but seems to help blend everything together to me).
6. NEVER EVER TOP THE DRINK OFF WITH CLUB SODA. The worst Old Fashioned's in the world are made with club soda. It turns a wonderful drink into a fizzy, whiskey flavored soft drink.
7. Stir it all together.
8. Drink.

Now if you are someone who thinks I have horribly botched the making of an Old Fashioned, you are welcome to leave your suggestions in comments. I promise I will look at them briefly before continuing to make the drink exactly the same way described above.

80's Movie Line of the Week

As promised, giving the people what they want -- More Coreys! This time from The Lost Boys.

Sam Emerson: So where're we going?
Michael Emerson: Nowhere.
Sam Emerson: So what's the rush? You're chasing that girl aren't you? Come on, admit it. I'm at the mercy of your sex glands, bud.

Late Night Television

Saturday night I was at a fun house party when my phone rang. The lovely voice on the other end was imploring me to find a television immediately. Apparently, there was some Kansas City version of American Idol on and it was must-see television. How could I decline?

So, I went to the living room and gave a brief explanation of why I was about to turn on the television. The description I gave elicited a mixture of knowing smirks, wide-eyed anticipation and boisterous guffaws. We turned the TV on, found Channel 9 and sat transfixed by what unfolded before our eyes.

It turns out we were watching a show called Harrah's Lucky Break. It really is just an American Idol knockoff filmed at Harrah's featuring local contestants. If you Google it, you will find that you and I may be the only people who didn't know it existed.

Anyway, we turned it on in time to see a single performance and the final announcement. It was only 10 minutes or so, but those 10 minutes contained hours worth of entertainment. The single performance was actually not bad, so it is hard for me to comment generally on the quality of the talent (though it sounds from other reviews that what we saw was an exception). What I can comment on is everything else.

As the oddly decent performance rambled through, the producers felt it important to make sure we got a look at the crowd. Awesome. The crowd seemed to be the result of a casting call for Midwestern casino regulars. The old lady who plays penny slots, the drunk college sports fan who lost his black jack money hours ago, the kids whose parents have reclaimed them after abandoning them to the arcade for several hours and (of course) the all-you-can eat couple. If I get the opportunity, I will watch every episode of Lucky Break just to take stock of the crowd.

There are also the judges, which I gather are different each week, and who are supposedly local celebrities. I recognized no one judging on Saturday night. They were, however, and interesting mix of people who have no business on television. Ditto the host, who perhaps was a local radio host.

At the end, they brought who appeared to be all the finalists to the stage. What I saw there made me sick with remorse that I had not seen the rest of the show. A lady in what may or may not have been a purple velvet dress and a guy in a turquoise suit are quite simply people that I should see perform. Some guy won and made a little speech. Everyone clapped and then it sort of just stopped without a real finish. That is probably the way it should be.

As for Channel 9, they followed this quality programming with a movie that I must believe was designed to enhance the perceived quality of the show that preceded it. The movie was called Theodore Rex. It was about Whoopi Goldberg and a dinosaur that wore tennis shoes who team up to solve mysteries. I am not kidding. Here is the proof:



We watched about 30 minutes of this movie before the curiosity of it could no longer compete with our desire not to see it. The party then resumed normal party activities. I like to think, however, that we all are a little different today because of what we saw. Maybe not better. Maybe not worse. But definitely different.

BCS Not the Dumbest Thing About College Football After All

It is still really dumb. But the voters from the USA Today coaches poll are evidently even dumber. The final AP poll of the year has Florida #1 and Utah #2 (with a few first place votes). Whatever. It's a flawed system, but it is the one we have.

But the USA Today poll has Florida #1, USC #2, Texas #3, and Utah #4. Well, if you don't want to allow Utah into the national championship picture, fine. But to suggest that the perfect season and thoroughly convincing bowl victory over the #6 team in the poll don't merit at least second place is just beyond ludicrous.

Also, the USA Today poll has Missouri 2 spots higher than Oklahoma State, which is farcical. Thank God it's basketball season!

BCS Bashing Time

With the start of the NCAA basketball tournament comes March Madness. With the Super Bowl comes parties, new commercials and oddly paired classic rockers and modern pop stars. And so on.

But with the end of the college bowl season comes the BCS Championship... and incessent bitching from fans, pundits, teams and anyone else who ever thought about the sport of college football. This year is no different because the BCS, for like the 12th time or something, has screwed up the national title picture again.

Utah proved to be the undoing of the BCS this time around. Rick Reilly has a column in ESPN the magazine declaring the Utes to be his national champion.

Argue with this, please. I beg you. Find me anybody else that went undefeated. Thirteen-and-zero. Beat four ranked teams. Went to the Deep South and seal-clubbed Alabama in the Sugar Bowl. The same Alabama that was ranked No. 1 for five weeks. The same Alabama that went undefeated in the regular season. The same Alabama that Florida beat in order to get INTO the BCS Championship game in the first place...

USC? Great year. Wonderful. Let's all go to SkyBar and celebrate. But it lost to Oregon State, a team Utah beat.

Texas? You think beating Ohio State by a nubby three points gets you the title? The Big Ten was 1-6 in bowl games! That's like pinning David Spade!

Florida and Oklahoma? They lost. Utah never did.

So that's it. Utah is the national champion. The Utes should probably have two now, actually. They went undefeated in 2004, too, and their coach still thinks they were the best team in the land. Smart fella named Urban Meyer. Coaches Florida now.

He makes a pretty persuasive case. And, of course, he is simply one of the legions of pundits and fans all facing this year's incarnation of the injustice that is the BCS.

And just about everyone points to the greedy BCS schools as the reason why this idiotic system remains. Bill James has a BCS-bashing article on Slate, however, that turns the blame around:

In the 1990s there was a strong movement, within the NCAA, to organize a national postseason football tournament. The problem was, had the NCAA in fact organized such a championship, two other events would almost certainly have followed:

1. The smaller schools, which outnumber the big football powerhouses about 5-to-1, would have voted to send a lot of the money to the smaller schools that in fact had not participated in the national championship contest in any meaningful way.

2. The big football schools would have bolted and revolted. They'd have walked out of the NCAA and formed their own organization. The two-tiered system of NCAA and NAIA schools would have been replaced by a three-tiered system with the NCAA occupying the middle tier.

The creation of the BCS system was simply a less dramatic revolt. And, as I said, the BCS schools were right: There is no reason why schools that don't fund programs to participate in the battle for the national championship should share in the proceeds of the contest.

A completely valid point that reminds us that there are two sides to everything... except the argument about whether the BCS will ever produce a satisfying conclusion to the college football season.

What the People Want

Last year I installed a blog counter at the bottom of the page to keep track of how many visits I get. I thought it would be fun to keep an eye on what prompted more people to take a look and what drew crickets. But I hadn't actually gone to the BlogCounter.com web site to take a look at all the info they collect.

What I found was amazing. In reverse order, here are the top 3 most visited posts in AA history:

#3 - Premier League Fan Zone

I had no idea there were so many soccer fans reading this thing.

#2 - Worthy Cause

This one makes sense because it is basically a list of great restaurants in KC. I love reading other people's lists of favorite eating spots, so why wouldn't other people feel the same way?

#1 80's Movie Quote of the Week (April 17)

This 80's movie quote comes from Haim and Feldman classic License to Drive.

Really? This is the most interesting thing that has ever been on this blog? By the way, it isn't even close. This post has almost twice as many hits as the number two post. I had no idea so many people loved the Coreys so much. Guess it's about time for a Lost Boys quote...

iTunes Finally Getting it Right

Apple finally moves over to the world of products I would consider using:

Apple said it would begin selling song downloads without the anticopying measures that have been part of its iTunes music store since it opened in 2003. It will also move away from its insistence on pricing songs at 99 cents.

DRM has been one of the silliest parts of the iTunes/iPod experience since they came into existence. The idea that I bought a song but could only use under certain circumstances or burn it a limited number of times was ridiculous. Maybe there is an iPod in my future after all.

He's Good Enough, He's Smart Enough...

and doggone it he's a Senator. Minnesota has ratified Al Franken as the winner of the Minnesota Senate election.

As an aside, I believe this may go down as my least original post ever. It's late in the day, and I'm tired. Cut me a little slack.

80's Movie Line of the Week

So Ghostbusters 2 isn't as good as Ghostbusters. But it does have nerd humor.

Ray: You think there's a connection between this Vigo character and the... slime?
Egon: Is the atomic weight of cobalt 58.9?

Quiet Time in 2009

What a year. Obama was elected president. The economy went in the tank. The Olympics were even better than usual. Kansas City sports teams were even worse than usual. Personally, my life had some serious upheaval. The whole year it seems was one big event after another.

It was sometimes unbelievable fun and sometimes maddeningly frustrating. But it was certainly not low key. So how about we pull 2009 aside and tell her that a little rest would be nice? I'm not asking for a boring year, but a year where the peaks and valleys were a little less pronounced would be just fine. I think we've all earned it.

Pet Peeve

Richard Cohen has an article about President Bush's reading list as provided by Karl Rove. He makes a great, if not entirely novel, point about the list being long but narrow. One more example of the president's unwillingness to consider other points of view. Great. I'm all on board with the idea.

But then Richard Cohen says this:

Bush read some novels, but they are mostly pre-movies, plotted not written, and lacking the beauty of worldly cynicism. I recommend Giuseppe di Lampedusa's "The Leopard." Delicious.

Delicious. I can think of no other word that makes me consider its user more pompous or pretentious. And for some reason it is literature that most often brings out this behavior in people. Other known causes are art films, installations, and general prickishness.

Back to Reality

If you are fortunate enough that your parents still live in your childhood home, and that your childhood was a pleasant experience, then you probably know that spending a few days at home can be a great experience. For me, it means great meals and lounging on the couch. It also means that I get to check out of reality for a few days. The internet connection at my parent's house is still highly suspect, so I tend not to spend large amounts of time keeping up with the world in my usual fashion.

As always, reality returns at some point. Today, I find that Iraq is having a resurgence of violence, Israel and Hamas are again at the brink of war, and a bitter divorce led to an 8 year old being shot in the face by Santa Claus. The real world is back, and I'm already looking forward to the next time it takes a short leave.

80's Movie Line: Holiday Edition

Alright, Die Hard isn't really a comedy. And this quote doesn't have anything to do with Christmas. But the fact is that there are quite a few Christmas quotes in the movie, and none of them are as good as the one below.

Those of you who have seen the movie will remember that John needed shoes really bad.

John McClane: Nine million terrorists in the world and I gotta kill one with feet smaller than my sister.

Snow Day Comics

I miss Calvin and Hobbes. Calvin's snowmen are one of the main reasons.

Speaking of Carl

This is maybe the best promotion I have ever heard from a minor league team.

WICHITA, KS- The Wichita Thunder has announced they will host "Carl Peterson - Blame the GM Night" for this Saturday's home game versus the Rapid City Rush.

The promotion is on behalf of all Kansas City Chiefs fans who learned Monday that longtime General Manager Carl Peterson had resigned from his position.

Any Thunder fan with the first name "Carl" or the last name "Peterson" will receive free admission to Saturday's game. Any fan wearing Chiefs gear will receive buy one get one free tickets to the game. Anyone in attendance named "Clark Hunt" will receive Thunder season tickets for the rest of 2008-09.

During the game, fans can also register at the novelty stand to win a pair of 2009 Chiefs tickets.

And the night before is "Rod Blagojevich Bribe Night." I'm tempted to drive to Wichita myself.

They'd Probably be Sneakers

It's very fitting to me that King Carl is going out within a month of President Bush leaving office. In so many ways, they are the same guy. It's nice that we can now watch them ride off into the sunset together.

One more thing I would love to see though is Carl getting the same treatment as the Prez and having a couple of shoes fired at him by a reporter. Do you think Whitlock could get his shoes off in a crowded room?

Best of 2008: Movies

Those of you who know me personally are aware that this has been an unusual year in my real life. One of the ways that has impacted the sillier, superficial part of my life is that I haven't seen nearly as many movies as I would like. Of the nominees for any of the major Golden Globe awards, I have seen only WALL-E and Pineapple Express. Both were very good, by the way.

Hopefully, I will see many of these movies soon (along with quite a few others I have missed). Until then, all I can say about 2008 was that The Dark Knight was everything I hoped it would be. Heath Ledger really was great. Christian Bale was better than he was the first time around. All in all, I think it added up to my favorite superhero movie in a long time. I imagine when I get around to a Top 10 list, it will be in the vicinity of the top.

80's Movie Line: Holiday Edition

Gremlins isn't exactly a Christmas movies, but it does take place at Christmas. And it has one of the best Christmas stories:

Kate: The worst thing that ever happened to me was on Christmas. Oh, God. It was so horrible. It was Christmas Eve. I was 9 years old. Me and Mom were decorating the tree, waiting for Dad to come home from work. A couple hours went by. Dad wasn't home. So Mom called the office. No answer. Christmas Day came and went, and still nothing. So the police began a search. Four or five days went by. Neither one of us could eat or sleep. Everything was falling apart. It was snowing outside. The house was freezing, so I went to try to light up the fire. That's when I noticed the smell. The firemen came and broke through the chimney top. And me and Mom were expecting them to pull out a dead cat or a bird. And instead they pulled out my father. He was dressed in a Santa Claus suit. He'd been climbing down the chimney... his arms loaded with presents. He was gonna surprise us. He slipped and broke his neck. He died instantly. And that's how I found out there was no Santa Claus.

Our Progressive Tax System

Kevin Drum has a good post that features the preceding chart. I don't have anything special to say about it really, but I run into enough people on a regular basis that tell me how unfairly the wealthy are treated in our tax system that I like to pass on graphs like these whenever I get the opportunity.

I apparently also like to write very long sentences.

At Least They Won Right...

Yesterday, I exited my car in Blue Springs and stepped into 57 degree weather. Now, I had not seen a weather report since earlier in the week. That means it is going to be hard for me to complain too much, but I'm pressing on with the story. I was meeting a friend near his house to catch the Chiefs Express to Arrowhead.

My friend stepped out of his car wearing a three layers of shirts, a hat, gloves, and a big coat. Weird, I thought. He asked me if I had a jacket, and explained that is was going to get "cooler." I rummaged through my trunk and found a rain jacket that was tantamount to a windbreaker.

Not more than 30 minutes later, we stepped off the bus at Arrowhead and the first breath out of my mouth was visible. "How cold is it supposed to get?" I asked. "30 degree drop," my buddy said.

By the middle of the second quarter, it was 24 degrees. I was still wearing a long sleeve t-shirt and a windbreaker. I've likely been colder in my life, but it is hard to remember exactly when.

I managed to make it through the entire game, which was itself best summed up by two phone conversations I had later that day. While talking to two separate people who had watched the game only to turn it off with a couple of minutes to go, I twice heard:

"Well, at least you got to see them win, right?"

Best of 2008: Music 2

Last year, I followed up the Top 10 albums post with a post containing the 10 best songs not on the top 10 albums. Here comes the same thing, only I've gotten lazy. I just don't want to do the work to pare down to 10, so I present you with the best 17 songs not on my top 10 albums (in no particular order).

Until the Day is Done, R.E.M.

All You Ever Wanted, The Black Keys

Scare Easy, Mudcrutch

Working Poor, Horsefeathers

Red River Shore, Bob Dylan

Crawl, Kings of Leon

Too Drunk to Dream, The Magnetic Fields

Meadowlarks, Fleet Foxes

The Old Days, Dr. Dog

Cobwebs, Ryan Adams & The Cardinals

Skinny Love, Bon Iver

Paper Face, Rivers Cuomo

Wreck My Flow, The Dirtbombs

I Just Want the Girl in the Blue Dress, Mike Doughty

Inní mér syngur vitleysingur, Sigur Rós

Salute Your Solution, The Raconteurs

Aly, Walk With Me, The Raveonettes

Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?, She and Him


(I did limit each band to one song on this list. Otherwise, the list might have grown even more unwieldy.)

Best of 2008: Music

Last year, I declared the 2007 best music year in some time, and I said I hoped 2008 was even close. As it turns out, it was. It wasn't as good as '07, but it was really good. The most interesting things is that much of it came from new sources. That was good because some of the stuff I was most excited about (Kings of Leon, Cold War Kids) turned out to disappoint. Fortunately, we have the Internet to help us find out about new music. Three cheers for the Internet.

Here are my favorite 10 albums of 2008, with a couple of the best songs from each.

1. The Walkmen – You and Me
Donde Esta la Playa, New Country
2. Vampire Weekend – Vampire Weekend
Oxford Comma, A-Punk
3. TV On the Radio – Dear Science
DLZ, Halfway Home
4. The Dodos -- Visiter
Walking, God?
5. Beck – Modern Guilt
Gamma Ray, Modern Guilt
6. Johnny Flynn – A Flarum
The Wrote & the Writ, Wayne Rooney
7. Eagles of Death Metal – Heart On
Secret Plans, I Wanna be in LA
8. Pale Young Gentlemen – Black Forest (Tra La La)
The Crook of My Good Arm, Marvelous Design
9. The Rumble Strips – Girls and Weather
Alarm Clock, Girls and Boys in Love
10. Pete and the Pirates – Little Death
Come on Feet, Eyes Like Tar

Special awards this year go to Bob Dylan's Tell Tale Signs: The Bootleg Series Vol. 8 for best album filled with stuff that had already been released in some form, and The Clash's Live at Shea Stadium for best live album. A "best songs not on the list above" post is forthcoming.

Arena League

According to the Star, the Arena League is suspending play for 2009.

“It’s pretty much a done deal to suspend the 2009 season and work toward a single entity-league,” Likens said. “We plan to start up again in 2010, if the owners vote this way. We’re prepared to play this year, and/or next.”

Now I never got into Arena League, but I have always thought that given several factors (including football's general popularity), Arena League Football had about as good a chance as is possible of creating a sustainable new sports league. My question then: is it possible in today's marketplace to envision any new sports league becoming financially viable and/or a major part of culture?

Love for Rickey

As I've mentioned before, Rickey Henderson is my favorite baseball player of all time. He's eligible for the Hall of Fame this year. Joe Posnanski has an excellent blog post about why he should receive a vote from every Hall voter.

And think about this: Pitchers REALLY did not want to walk Rickey for all the obvious reasons. I mean, Ted Williams, sure, walking him often made sense; I suspect most pitchers did not kick themselves for walking Ted Williams. But Rickey — he was probably going to steal second on you, maybe steal third. Even if he didn’t steal, he was going to create all sorts of tension. Nobody WANTED to walk Rickey Henderson.

But they could not help it because Rickey would get in that crouch (Jim Murray wrote that his strike zone was the size of Hitler’s heart), and he would foul off pitches, and he would just WILL his way on base. Put it this way — and I’m about give you one of my all-time favorite statistics: Rickey Henderson walked 796 times in his career LEADING OFF AN INNING. Think about this again. There would be nothing, absolutely nothing, a pitcher would want to avoid more than walking Rickey Henderson to lead off an inning. And yet he walked SEVEN HUNDRED NINETY SIX times to lead off an inning.

Posnanski gives quite a bit more evidence in Rickey's favor as well. And he doesn't even include comedy.

Says it All

Everything you need to know about Dwight Howard's game you can infer by Marcus Camby's expression.
(Click the photo to see it bigger and get the full effect)

80's Movie Line Holiday Edition

Scrooged updated the classic Dickens story, and reminded us what the spirit of Christmas was all about.

Earl Cross: All day long I listen to people give me excuses why they can't work. My legs hurt. My back aches. I'm only four. The sooner he learns life isn't handed to him on a silver platter, the better.

Panic on All Sides

Perhaps still convinced Obama is a socialist, there are still some wingnuts out there trying to challenge the president elect's eligibility to serve. Some liberals, meanwhile, are starting to fear they helped elect a closet centrist, and they aren't very happy about it.

Is it possible to be a liberal that the right fears beyond any reasonable measure without really being liberal at all?

I would guess so.

Pretty Good at Basketball

Stephen Curry is someone you really should see play basketball. You hopefully did last year when Davidson went on an improbable NCAA run, finally losing to Kansas in a great game in the elite eight. If you didn't, find a Davidson game now.

Yesterday, Curry scored 44 as Davidson beat North Carolina State. Among the riveted spectators was none other than LeBron James who looked as giddy in the crowd as everyone else. Curry drove, he hit runners, he hit mid-range jumpers, and he hit at least one shot from around 30 feet.

This is a game after Curry posted a 0 because Loyola University chose to face guard Curry with two players for an entire game and let Davidson play 4 on 3. Davidson won that game by 30, so we may not see that strategy again. But that game was sandwiched by two 44 point outbursts, and the 0 has not stopped Curry from leading the country in scoring at almost 30 per game.

Breaking News

Jack Shafer has a piece at Slate about the struggle between accuracy and timeliness in reporting during events like the massacre in Mumbai. This is something I thought about quite a bit as I watched the events on television. Shafer mentions the complicity of all types of media, but I certainly notice most among the television outlets. It can be completely frustrating to watch any unfolding event because the first thing you hear almost guaranteed to be partially wrong if not completely wrong.

It seems though, that this is likely inevitable during a chaotic event such as the one in Mumbai. While it would be good for reporters to make more explicit the transient nature of their reports, there is very little doubt that no information at all would not be preferable.

What concerns me more is when this issue creeps into non-crisis reporting. For instance, NPR had a reporter out on Monday morning talking to retailers who suggested that sales had been pretty good. Kevin Drum pointed out that news outlets were reporting that the National Retail Federation was estimating a 20% increase in Black Friday sales over the weekend. Yet, it turns out that sales were actually up around 1% with many major retailers reporting decreases.

Perhaps news agencies feel the National Retail Federation estimates are an important source (though, as Drum points out, the methodology is very poor). But I suspect that what is more important is the fact that these numbers and the opinions of some people at the mall are simply important because they are the first information available. It seems to me that Black Friday sales are the kind of topic that could wait for substantive information instead of first available.

Unions

I don't have the expertise to know if this point by Matt Yglesias bears out under scrutiny, but it certainly seems plausible on its face.

What I would say about car companies and unions is this. We had a period of time in the United States when prevailing labor law made it viable to organize private sector unions in the teeth of management opposition. So a bunch of firms were unionized at that time. Then we more-or-less closed the door on such unionization. And then after the door shut, new car plants were opened in anti-union jurisdictions. That obviously put the unionized firms at a disadvantage. But that’s different from saying that unionization is killing the car industry — cars are made and sold in Europe just fine. Meanwhile, in a capitalist system over the course of decades and decades it’s just inevitable that some sectors of the economy will rise and others will decline. Since we’ve made it so difficult to organize new unions, and since things change over time, we have disproportionate concentration of our private sector unions in the declining manufacturing sector. But that’s not unions causing the decline, it’s just things changing over time. The union-dominated movie and television production industries have become more central to the economy over the same time period. These things just happen. In a decent economy, though, we need to make sure that as new industries rise the workforce in those industries has a realistic shot at forming unions and bargaining collectively.

Gettin' Schooled

We are assured by those who don't want to admit that growing inequality is a problem that we simply have an education gap. Those who are willing to work hard enough to get an education will do just fine in this worldview. One problem:

Over all, the report found, published college tuition and fees increased 439 percent from 1982 to 2007, adjusted for inflation, while median family income rose 147 percent. Student borrowing has more than doubled in the last decade, and students from lower-income families, on average, get smaller grants from the colleges they attend than students from more affluent families.

So college is roughly three times more expensive than it was 25 years ago. And what the numbers quoted above don't show is that the wealthy have accounted for most of the median income gain. For low income families, it more like 4 times more expensive. That is a pretty pricey ticket to the top.

Feeling 10 Again

According to my latest Rolling Stone magazine, the top three active (whatever that is) rock radio hits are from AC/DC, Metallica, and Guns'n'Roses. Apparently all it takes to resurrect three bands who haven't been really successful in at least 15 years is to have a chart where the alternatives are Shinedown, Mudvayne, and Disturbed.

As for that "active" label, what is it really? Judging by most of what it on the list it seems it might be code for "crappy." Wikipedia says that "active rock plays current rock artists with a mix of classic rock songs." Fine, but I still have no idea what the word "active" is intended to signify. Anyone know?

On a personal note, I am going to see AC/DC in January. This will leave the Rolling Stones as the only still functional band on my list of favorite bands I've never seen.

Manhood

An article in Slate comments on an important truth.

There are a million ways to slight a rival's manhood, but to suggest that he enjoys Zima is one of the worst. Zima was the original "malternative"—a family of alcoholic beverages that eventually came to include such abominations as Smirnoff Ice and Bacardi Silver—and it has long been considered the very opposite of macho: a drink that fragile coeds swill while giving each other pedicures.

Very true. The important question is what other accusations are emasculation by proxy.

Antique shopping, convertible ownership, small dogs as pets? I'm not sold on any of these yet. Ideas?

80's Movie Line Holiday Edition

Last year for the holiday edition, I used only quotes from Christmas Vacation. I could probably continue that practice for the next five years and still have good stuff. But there are a lot of great Christmas movies in the 80's. One of the best is A Christmas Story.

Ralphie as Adult: With as much dignity as he could muster, the Old Man gathered up the sad remains of his shattered Major Award. Later that night, alone in the backyard, he buried it next to the garage. Now I could never be sure, but I thought that I heard the sound of "Taps" being played. Gently.

Did Someone Spike the Turkey I Haven't Eaten Yet?

I think I may be hallucinating this morning because I believe I just saw Rick Astley singing his 80s classic "Never Going to Give You Up" on a float with a bunch of goofy looking puppets during the Macy's parade.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Wait, now there is some pre-teen named Charice who is singing "Because You Love Me" on a Good Housekeeping float designed like a riverboat.

I can't believe my parents let me watch this stuff as a kid.

From the Horse's Mouth

Are Republican lobbyists better than Democratic ones?

In 2005, at the apogee of Republican power, the Motion Picture Association of America recruited John Feehery from a top job with former Representative J. Dennis Hastert, the Illinois Republican who was then speaker of the House. But when the Democratic takeover the next year devalued Mr. Feehery’s Republican connections, he lost his defense against internal personality conflicts, people involved in the association’s lobbying say, and within weeks he was out the door.

A spokesman for the association declined to comment on the departure. So did Mr. Feehery, who now runs his own lobbying shop. But he said Republican lobbyists would always be in demand because Democrats lack the stomach to push for industry goals that go against their party, like rolling back environmental regulations.

“At the end of the day,” Mr. Feehery said, “Democrats don’t like to ask for the order” — the client’s objective.

So apparently, the answer is yes. Republicans are better at lobbying. And they are better because they have the guts to abandon their beliefs for the right dollar figure. Awesome.

Via Kevin Drum.

Six?!?!?!?!?

I really didn't want to post about the Chiefs again this season. I had settled nicely into expecting the worst and being nicely surprised when anything at all positive happened. But today, I read Joe Posnanski's column in the Star.

The Chiefs have the worst pass rush in the history of professional football. I am not saying this to be flip, and I don’t mean this in the exaggerated way that you might say, “This is the worst traffic jam I’ve ever seen,” every Monday when taking I-35 North. No, these Chiefs are quantifiable the worst pass-rushing team ever. They have six sacks this year. That’s six sacks. The whole team. The whole year. Six sacks...

The Chiefs have six sacks. Of course, that’s last in the NFL. The Chiefs have six sacks. There are 19 individual players in the NFL who have at least that many. The Chiefs have six sacks. Derrick Thomas once had seven sacks in a single game. The Chiefs are on pace for nine sacks all year, and that would be an NFL record. The current record is held by the 1982 Indianapolis Colts, who had 11 sacks that year. And that was in a strike-shortened, nine-game season.

This is startling. It always seemed watching the Chiefs this year that they weren't getting much pressure on the quarterback, but this was not a stat I expected to see. Back in the Dick Vermeil days, I thought we were seeing some of the worst defenses ever. But those 31st and 32nd ranked defenses all had sack totals in the 30s.

This is truly incredible. And as Posnanski points out later in his article, the Chiefs not getting any sacks are the high draft choices the Chiefs have paid lots of money to over the last few years. But hey, ticket prices are going up next year right?

"Is Dhiib" is the New "Arrrr"

"Is Dhiib" translates to "surrender." It's what you are increasingly likely to hear is you happen to be on a ship traveling of the west coast of Africa. Pirating is back in fashion, and these guys are taking down some huge booty.

Somali pirates have been paid more than $150m (£101m) in ransoms in the past 12 months, Kenya's foreign minister says...

Ninety-five attacks have been recorded off the Somali coast this year, including the recent capture of a Saudi tanker carrying a $100m cargo of oil.

Of course, the obvious solution to this problem is to release the Kraken. He will be vacating the office of the vice-presidency soon anyway.

Finally...

... we get official word yesterday that Missouri blew it.

Republican John McCain has defeated President-elect Barack Obama in Missouri — the last state to be decided in the 2008 presidential election.

McCain's narrow victory over Obama breaks a bellwether streak in which Missourians had picked the winning presidential candidate in every election since 1956.

Of all the elections for us to get it wrong. Indiana and North Carolina voted for Obama, but we couldn't manage it.

In some ways it is difficult for me to understand, but then I also just had a conversation with three otherwise bright guys from three different parts of the state who are convinced that Sarah Palin may win the 2012 election. Maybe I should be surprised it was as close as it was.

Light, Love and Codpieces

Via Andrew Sullivan, Vanity Fair has an article about Thomas Kinkade's expansion into the film industry. Apparently, Kinkade wrote a memo instructing the crew of the film how to appropriately make a movie as cheeseball as his paintings. Among the 16 tips he offered:

9) A sense of space. My paintings feature both intimate spaces and dramatic deep space effects. We should strive for intimate scenes to be balanced by deeper establishing shots. (I know this particular one is self-evident, but I am reminded of it as I see the pacing of the depth of field in Kubrick's "Barry Lyndon".)

12) Surprise details. Suggest a few "inside references" that are unique to this production. Small details that I can mention in interviews that stimulate second or third viewings -- for example, a "teddy bear mascot" for the movie that appears occasionally in shots. This is a fun process to pursue, and most movies I'm aware of normally have hidden "inside references". In the realm of fine art we refer to this as "second reading, third reading, etc." A still image attracts the viewer with an overall impact, then reveals smaller details upon further study.

16) Most important concept of all -- THE CONCEPT OF LOVE. Perhaps we could make large posters that simply say "Love this movie" and post them about. I pour a lot of love into each painting, and sense that our crew has a genuine affection for this project. This starts with Michael Campus as a Director who feels great love towards this project, and should filter down through the ranks. Remember: "Every scene is the best scene."

I don't know about anyone else, but as I read the tips I certainly became convinced that Thomas Kinkade's Christmas Cottage was probably likely to go down as an equal of anything Kubrick ever did.

The story that precedes the tips, however, is also a fun read. It includes some Kinkade bashing from the art community. It also includes this awesome fact:

In 2006, the Artist Formally Known for Prints was successfully sued by two former gallery franchise owners, and a Los Angeles Times article from the same year accused him of drunkenly disrupting a Siegfried and Roy show in Las Vegas by repeatedly yelling, “Codpiece!”

Perhaps the codpiece was one of those "inside references" Kinkade recommends.

p.s. Be the first to order the new Thomas Kinkade NASCAR Thunder print. Luminous!

Question of the Day

Why must our choices be:

a) our quality of life is better than it has ever been so we should never acknowledge that the world has deficiencies,

or

b) life is still patently unfair so we should be wary of acknowledging that human beings in general are experiencing their salad days?

80's Movie Line of the Week

Breaking the rules again. So I Married an Axe Murderer is from 1993, but I've been hanging out in San Francisco. This is the funniest comedy in the vicinity of the 80's that is set in San Francisco. You see how the logic works.

Stuart Mackenzie: Well, it's a well known fact, Sonny Jim, that there's a secret society of the five wealthiest people in the world, known as The Pentavirate, who run everything in the world, including the newspapers, and meet tri-annually at a secret country mansion in Colorado, known as The Meadows.
Tony Giardino: So who's in this Pentavirate?
Stuart Mackenzie: The Queen, The Vatican, The Gettys, The Rothschilds, *and* Colonel Sanders before he went tits up. Oh, I hated the Colonel with is wee *beady* eyes, and that smug look on his face. "Oh, you're gonna buy my chicken! Ohhhhh!"
Charlie Mackenzie: Dad, how can you hate "The Colonel"?
Stuart Mackenzie: Because he puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes ya crave it fortnightly, smartass!

Say What?

I know it doesn't really matter anymore because she isn't going to be VP and because she will probably never get that close again, but Sarah Palin continues to shock me. Via Kevin Drum, here is an actual answer from an interview today with Wolf Blitzer:

BLITZER: Does that mean you want to come up with a new Sarah Palin initiative that you want to release right now.

PALIN: Gah! Nothing specific right now. Sitting here in these chairs that I’m going to be proposing but in working with these governors who again on the front lines are forced to and it’s our privileged obligation to find solutions to the challenges facing our own states every day being held accountable, not being just one of many just casting votes or voting present every once in a while, we don’t get away with that. We have to balance budgets and we’re dealing with multibillion dollar budgets and tens of thousands of employees in our organizations.

I may never read a sentence like that again. God willing.

Alias

Most online quizzes are dumb, but this one is so ridiculous it is fascinating. Apparently, Jim is not an average enough name.

Your Average American Name Is...

Richard Allen Hall

What's Your Average American Name?

Update: If you your name actually is Richard, your Average American Name is Andrew David Adams. Sounds an awful lot like Ancillary Adams, which I suppose brings things full circle.

Power Up

With the notable exceptions of people and soft drinks, everything seems to get smaller over time. It seems nuclear reactors are going that way too.

Using technology licensed from the U.S. government, an Arizona-based company is planning to bring a new generation of miniature nuclear reactors to market. The Hyperion Hydride Reactor is not much larger than a hot tub, is totally sealed and self-operating, has no moving parts and, beyond refueling, requires no maintenance of any sort. The reactor will output 27MW, enough to power a community of 20,000 homes, says Hyperion Energy, makers of the new reactor. The first models will roll off the assembly line in five years.

Sometime in the future Dick Cheney may be able to power the locks on his man-sized safe at his undisclosed location with his very own nuclear power source.

There's Going to Be a Few Changes...

Dan sent me this. I wish I hadn't heard people reacting this way in real life.

Get the latest news satire and funny videos at 236.com.

80's Movie Quote of the Week

Over the last few days, I think lots of people have been thinking about what it means to be American. I think this quote from European Vacation spells it out pretty well:

Clark Griswold: There it is, kids, my motherland.
Rusty Griswold: Dad, Grandma's from Chicago.
Clark Griswold: Shut up, Russ.

Bizness

It seems luxury retailers took a huge hit last month. The story, unfortunately, fails to mention to what extent these retailers could have been propped up by Sarah Palin's continued access to RNC credit cards.

The Media

Look, I tend to be someone who thinks the media has a tougher job than most people acknowledge. They get pounded on the right for having liberal bias, and they get pounded on the left for getting played by the right. Almost everyone thinks the media is uniformly bad at its assigned task.

I don't share that opinion generally, but I may be swayable. The fact that reporters may have known that the United States had a chance of electing a leader with an appalling lack of basic knowledge about the world, and did not cover it, is inexcusable. Off the record comments or not, the press does us virtually no good if it does not hold our leaders to some base level of accountability.

What the...

In all my excitement, I hadn't noticed that Alaska is about to reelect a convicted felon. I don't really have a comment about that.

What a Night

I couldn't be much happier today. Pennsylvania was called before I made it to my watch party, and the whole thing was just a drama-free celebration. I wish my state would've cooperated, but that's nitpicking at this point. What a speech by Obama. What a speech by McCain. It was a good night for the future of America.

You Betcha!

A reader letter excerpted in a National Review post:

I've been making calls into Pennsylvania to do last-minute GOTV for the Good Guys. Of the 10 or so times I've reached live people, I have gotten three very pleasant-sounding ladies who informed me that they had already, or were about to, cast their vote for "Sarah." They were pleased to hear that a man from Texas had cast his ballot for the exact same candidate.

Does this mean they wrote in Palin for president, or are simply voting McCain/Palin in hopes that the old guy isn't around very long? Either way (or probably neither way), these are clearly people who I would prefer not to be stuck next to in a voting line.

I Don't See Your Name Here Anywhere

My polling place was one of several this morning that had a little trouble getting started:

“We did have issues in Ward 5 this morning,” said Melodie Powell, chairperson of the Kansas City Board of Election Commissioners. “The poll logs got intermingled.”

She blamed a computer glitch for the problem. The election board became aware of the problem about 6:30 a.m. and it sent out blank polling logs and teams of workers to help correct the problem. Ward 5 includes the Valentine neighborhood and parts of Midtown and the Country Club Plaza areas.

The correct books were delivered to the polls by about 8 a.m.

So they got it fixed. No big deal right? Maybe not.

Voter Kristin Gernon said she couldn’t wait any longer and had to leave her polling place on 39th Street shortly after 7 a.m. Gernon was told by a polling official there that the problem affected about ten polling places. Gernon said she would return later to vote, but that many others couldn’t wait any longer and might not be able to return.

We have got to come up with a better voting system.

Just in Case You Need One More Reason

The chart above makes the case for Obama as well as the most eloquent written argument. Via Matt Yglesias.

Where We Are

No matter how you feel about the accuracy of polling, or the unexpected factors that might make a difference tomorrow, this chart is pretty solid proof that Obama is in the best position a Democrat has been in for awhile.

Amazing

100,000 in St. Louis.

75,000 in Kansas City.

Impressive. But nothing compared to what I saw on Saturday night. I traveled down to my hometown of Springfield, MO on Saturday night and joined 30,000 people at the Obama rally.

That 30,000 may be the most amazing thing I have seen through this campaign. If you know anything about southwest Missouri, you know it is not the home of many who would traditionally vote for Obama. Yet, people waited in line for hours to go and cheer our prospective president.

It's hard to express how good it made me feel. Maybe, just maybe, Obama might even win Missouri on his way to victory Tuesday.